Author Archives: Toni Cao

About Toni Cao

Toni is the co founder of China Love Date

Why Asian singles might not love Gwen Stefani

The Asian singles you’re dating might really love American pop culture, fashion and music, so you should be up-to-date on all the latest trends for conversation purposes and potential gift giving.

Asian women

As someone who keeps up with American pop culture, you will be familiar with Gwen Stefani, but as popular as she might be in the U.S., she does not sit well with many of the ladies in Asian countries.

This week, the pop star, fashionista and designer released her comeback song, “Baby Don’t Lie”, and the song is getting great reviews; however, it was ten years ago that Stefani, the former front woman for No Doubt, released her first solo record Love. Angel. Music. Baby. Since then, she’s also put out a line of children’s clothing for Target called Harajuku Mini and has her own fragrance line known as Harajuku Lovers. However, it was the album in particular that made lots of Asian singles a little upset.

Think back to the Harajuku girls that were prominently featured in the album art, music videos, performances and the singer’s entourage during that period. Many Asian females saw this as a racist and offensive portrayal.

Some people think that Stefani paved the way for a whole new era of objectifying Asian women and subjugating them as “the Other”, but she claims that she really loves the culture.

Needless to say, this could lead to some very heated yet very interesting conversations with any Asian woman you might be dating.

Do you know who the Chinese dating gods are?

So you’re into Chinese dating, but do you know anything about the deities that represent love and lust in Chinese mythology?

Chinese gods

Yue Lao

You’ve heard of the Man in the Moon, but have you heard of the Man under the Moon? Meet Yue Lao, a popular Chinese deity. He is the overseer of heterosexual marriage and is often connected to the red thread of destiny. He is known for binding two people’s hearts together in love and marriage. The most well known story involving this god might be that of Wei Gu, who wanted to know who was destined to become his wife. When Yue Lao showed him the vision of an old woman and young child living in poverty, Wei Gu ordered that they be killed. The child was injured but managed to escape, and she ended up becoming Wei Gu’s wife years later.

Tu Er Shen

Tu Er Shen is a relatively minor figure in Chinese mythology, probably because he represents homosexual love and marriage. As a mortal, he was known as Hu Tianbao and was considered a “peeping tom” and subsequently beaten to death. However, the gods were impressed by his unrequited love and restored him to life as a deity instead of a mere mortal. In many cases, Tu Er Shen is depicted as a rabbit. It is worth mentioning, however, that despite Tu Er Shen being worshipped, homosexual activity is a criminal offense in China.

Of course, there are more deities that oversee Chinese dating, including Chuang-Mu, who is the goddess of the bedroom and sexual delights. There is also Fu-Hsi, who is the god of happiness and oversees love, destiny and success.

Giving gifts to Chinese girls

If you have been dating Chinese girls for any period of time, you might have picked up on the notion that gift-giving is a pretty big deal in the Chinese culture, and it’s a little bit different than the way things are done in the West.


In the West, it is often the thought that counts when giving a gift and not the actual value of the present itself. In many cases in China, however, the value does come into play. This can be challenging for many guys, but don’t let this scare you away from dating Chinese women or buying them gifts. The truth is that for most modern women, the thought really does count!

Gifts can be categorized into two groups: those for special occasions and those that can be given at any time. Chinese girls love to receive gifts, especially those that come as a surprise. Surprises mean that you have been thinking about them. Things like scarves and flowers are great surprise gifts.

If you really want to make an impression, go for the gold, and that could mean literally. However, the good news is that you don’t have to invest in expensive jewelry to impress her if it’s out of your budget. Many American products such as perfume, cosmetics and clothing are incredibly expensive in China, so if you send her some small items that don’t seem like such a big deal in the U.S., she might be completed wowed.

Popcorn and movie stubs

Asian dating ideas: Asian horror movie night

Since October is upon us and Halloween is right around the corner, you might be in the mood for some spooky Asian dating ideas. How about a Chinese horror movie night with your lucky lady?

Although the kung fu genre might very well be China’s most popular, the country has released some of the scariest horror flicks to date. You might not have heard of these films, but here are five scary movies to get started with:

  • A Chinese Ghost StoryThis 1987 movie is actually a romantic horror film based loosely on the writings of Qing Dynasty scribe Pu Songling. It was popular at its time of release, so it is pretty easy to find. It stars Joey Wong, Leslie Cheung and Wu Ma.
  • The Lonely Spirit in an Old BuildingProduced by several teachers at the Beijing Film Academy, this 1989 film is a classic Chinese horror movie. It was banned at the time due to it scaring an old man to death.
  • Painted SkinThis movie isn’t particularly frightening, but it is a demon tale with a whole lot of kung fu mixed in. This 2008 film starring Betty Sun, Zhou Xun, Chen Kun and Donnie Yen is based on a short story by Pu Songling.
  • The Phantom LoverThis 1995 movie is a remake of the classic Chinese horror movie Song at Midnight (1937). It is heartbreakingly beautiful, haunting and a little scary.
  • The Game of KillingStarring Xiao Ran Li, Jia Song, Fan Liao, and Roy Cheungk, this 2004 movie seems like it might just be about four hit men getting together on Fridays for poker, but what’s lurking in the shadows?

Just remember, Asian dating doesn’t have to be any different from other kind of dating. No matter what cultures or countries you are both from, chances are everyone loves movie night!