Author Archives: Toni Cao

About Toni Cao

Toni is the co founder of China Love Date

Asian dating? Advice on posting better pictures

If you’re into Asian dating, you will probably need to make an online dating profile, which will inevitably include lots of pictures.  You don’t have to be a professional photographer – or pay one – to get the best pictures up.
We’ve put together some quick tips that will make your photos seem a lot better than the competition.

Dating

  • Pay attention to the lighting.  If the lighting isn’t quite right, you’re going to look a little weird.  You could also make yourself look tired in the wrong sort of light.  Remember, indirect lighting is better than harsh sunlight. You should also avoid fluorescent bulbs.
  • Stay away from the mirror.  A selfie taken in the bathroom mirror might very well be one of the most unappealing photos, so keep it off your Asian dating profile.  Get someone else to take the picture.
  • Use a flattering angle.  If you aim the picture directly at your face at eye level, you might distort your features.  Avoid profile shots as well.  Always shoot from an angle, preferably from above.
  • Take off the hat.  Sure, you might look super cute in that baseball cap, but don’t wear it for your picture.  You can include one picture with your favorite hat, but don’t make a habit of it!  Remember, never use a hat to cover up the fact that you might have a receding hairline.
  • Smile pretty.  You don’t have to exclaim “Cheese!” to take a nice picture, but you do want a nice smile.  The goal is to appear casual and upbeat, which makes you more appealing to members of the opposite sex.

Good luck with your pictures.

Are today’s Asian singles traditional Chinese women?

A frequently asked question among Western men is whether or not today’s Asian singles are anything like the traditional Chinese woman.  The truth is that there is no clear-cut answer.

Chinese women 1

China has an ancient culture and a long history, and many women do respect their cultural heritage.  However, that doesn’t mean that Asian singles of today aren’t also completely modern, despite having deeply traditional roots.
So, what is a traditional Chinese woman?  Historically speaking, men have been seen as the center of the family as China has a traditionally patriarchal society.  Dating back to the time of Confucius, ancestral rites and familial ties were highly favored and women’s roles were seen primarily as kinship roles such as wife, mother, daughter, sister, and so on.  Within these traditional roles, women were expected to comply with the wishes of the men in their lives.  This meant they obeyed their fathers when they were unmarried, their husbands, and then their sons if they ever became widowed.

In later centuries, the roles shifted slightly and the roles of men and women were seen in terms of yin (women) and yang (men).  Women, as yin, were seen as receptive, passive, soft, and tranquil while men were the dominating opposite.  It is important to note that in this traditional sense, it is not a social separation between men and women, but rather a natural one; the universe has two forces that complement each other completely.

It is these basic principles from which the premise of the “traditional Chinese woman” hails.  While many people still hold these views sacred, the modern Chinese woman is a much more authoritative force than ever before – in a good way!

Dating Asian women? Fun facts about the Chinese language

Part of the fun of dating Asian women for many Westerners is getting exposure to a different country and culture.  However, when it comes to the Chinese language – of which there are many dialects – learning the language or even just some of the most basic phrases can seem daunting.

Chinese

Learning Chinese doesn’t have to be a scary thought.  It can actually be a very rewarding experience.  After all, plenty of people speak the language in one form or another.  In hopes of taking away some of the hesitation you might feel, we’ve put together some fun facts about the language:

  • More than 800 million people speak Mandarin, the official language of China.  If you break that down based on the planet’s population, that’s one in five people!
  • Learning Chinese isn’t as hard as you probably think.  European languages – and English – are actually more difficult to learn than Chinese thanks to all of the tenses, plurals, cases, and genders involved.  Chinese grammar is pretty straightforward, but it is tonal, which means the pitch of your voice matters.
  • You might already know a little Chinese.  A lot of Chinese words and phrases have been Anglicized, so you might already have a good base.  For example, that cup of cha in the morning actually comes from a Mandarin word (chá) and Kung-fu comes from gōngfu!
  • Lots of Chinese jokes are puns or plays on words.  This might make learning the language a little more appealing.  If you like to challenge yourself, this is a great way to learn to be funny in your new language, making it easier to break the ice when dating Asian women.
  • Learning Chinese can actually make learning other Asian languages easier.  The ability to read and write Chinese characters will inevitably make it a little easier for you to learn other Asian languages, such as Japanese.

The do’s and don’ts of Asian dating

When it comes to Asian dating, there are a lot of cultural differences between western men and Chinese women and this can make the relationship particularly challenging. Dating across cultures is never easy, but it is possible with a little effort!

Dating someone, after all, is about finding that special someone, making a connection, and maybe even spending the rest of your life with that person! So, to reduce that cultural burden, here are a few do’s and don’ts that every western man should know about Asian dating.

Chinese sign

The do’s

On the first few dates, it is particularly important to be polite and gentle. Most Chinese women will not allow you to see the ‘real her’ until she has gotten to know you a lot better. This is particularly true of Chinese women when looking for love via online dating sites. Typically, they want a cross-cultural relationship, which is often completely different than dating someone from China.

Another helpful hint is to be generous with the compliments, but not overly so. Chinese women go to great lengths to be as beautiful as possible on romantic dates, so the effort should not go unnoticed. Because they want to make a good impression, a compliment will go a long way.

When dating a Chinese woman, it is important that you contribute to the conversation, perhaps taking the lead in the discussion every now and then. Chinese women often prefer talkative, confident men who have something interesting to say. And remember, some Chinese women may take a while to open up and be as talkative as they would be with an old friend, so give it a little time.

The don’ts

Although, as mentioned, Chinese women want a confident western man, being over confident can be a problem. Modesty is a virtue in the Chinese culture, so you should do your best to heed that rule. It is never a good idea to show off your superiority to others or to talk down to anyone else.

In western societies, dating often moves quite quickly from one stage to the next, but this is not always the case in China. Many Chinese women prefer to take the relationship step-by-step. This means that you might not always get a kiss on the first date, and if you should try, you might find that you will scare her away. The key is to pay attention to her cues and never assume.

Another thing to remember when dating a Chinese woman is to know that it is up to you – the man – to reach out and request the next date. In western dating scenarios, women often call to arrange the second date, but this is a big no-no in China. Do not assume that she will call you up if she wants to see you again because the chances are she will be waiting for your call.

Although these are not all of the ‘do’s and don’ts of Asian dating, they are a good start. So, have fun and good luck!