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Asian Dating

The do’s and don’ts of Asian dating

When it comes to Asian dating, there are a lot of cultural differences between western men and Chinese women and this can make the relationship particularly challenging. Dating across cultures is never easy, but it is possible with a little effort!

Dating someone, after all, is about finding that special someone, making a connection, and maybe even spending the rest of your life with that person! So, to reduce that cultural burden, here are a few do’s and don’ts that every western man should know about Asian dating.

Chinese sign

The do’s

On the first few dates, it is particularly important to be polite and gentle. Most Chinese women will not allow you to see the ‘real her’ until she has gotten to know you a lot better. This is particularly true of Chinese women when looking for love via online dating sites. Typically, they want a cross-cultural relationship, which is often completely different than dating someone from China.

Another helpful hint is to be generous with the compliments, but not overly so. Chinese women go to great lengths to be as beautiful as possible on romantic dates, so the effort should not go unnoticed. Because they want to make a good impression, a compliment will go a long way.

When dating a Chinese woman, it is important that you contribute to the conversation, perhaps taking the lead in the discussion every now and then. Chinese women often prefer talkative, confident men who have something interesting to say. And remember, some Chinese women may take a while to open up and be as talkative as they would be with an old friend, so give it a little time.

The don’ts

Although, as mentioned, Chinese women want a confident western man, being over confident can be a problem. Modesty is a virtue in the Chinese culture, so you should do your best to heed that rule. It is never a good idea to show off your superiority to others or to talk down to anyone else.

In western societies, dating often moves quite quickly from one stage to the next, but this is not always the case in China. Many Chinese women prefer to take the relationship step-by-step. This means that you might not always get a kiss on the first date, and if you should try, you might find that you will scare her away. The key is to pay attention to her cues and never assume.

Another thing to remember when dating a Chinese woman is to know that it is up to you – the man – to reach out and request the next date. In western dating scenarios, women often call to arrange the second date, but this is a big no-no in China. Do not assume that she will call you up if she wants to see you again because the chances are she will be waiting for your call.

Although these are not all of the ‘do’s and don’ts of Asian dating, they are a good start. So, have fun and good luck!

Asian dating online? Tips for that first message

Asian dating online can be a lot of fun, but if you’re new at the practice, you might need a few tips for sending that first message.  Just like a pick-up line in a person-to-person exchange, the first message can range from silly to weird.

online dating - messages

There is an art to online Asian dating.  In fact, lots of people receive hundreds of messages every month, so you really want yours to stand out when you make your move.  With the right combination of intelligence and charm, your messages will start to garner a response from those you want to meet most!

Here are a few light-hearted suggestions.  Remember, your goal is to catch her attention while not coming off as a creep.  It’s all about having fun and being honest…

  • Hey, what’s up?  There really isn’t a requirement for creativity.  If you just want to send a simple “hello” message, go for it.  This is actually a pretty effective route to take since it is so simple.
  • You like that? Me, too!  If you’ve spotted someone who has similar interests, go ahead and message her about that common link.  It shows that you’ve paid attention to her profile and might be someone she would be interested in meeting.
  • That’s really cool!  As you’re going through potential dates, you might come across something that an individual has done or made.  Go ahead and send a message offering your thoughts about it and invite her for a chat!

Although there really is no right or wrong way to send that first message, we hope these simple ideas help you out.  If you’ve got a different approach, let us know!

Got a date with Asian singles? Learn about Chinese food’s evolution

The next time you get ready for a date with Asian singles, you might want to be armed with a little cultural knowledge.  In China, food is a large part of the culture.  You might already enjoy partaking in some Chinese food every now and then, but taking the time to learn about the evolution of the country’s food will show that you are sincerely interested.

Chinese food 1

The next time you have a date with Asian singles, you can impress them with your knowledge of Chinese cuisine.  For example, did you know that the cuisine dates back almost 5,000 years?  In fact, fossilized noodles were actually found in China’s Qinghai Province back in 2005 that were thought to be about 4,000 years old.

During the Shang Dynasty, which dates from 1600 to 1029 BCE, a chef known as Yi Yin, who also happened to be the prime minister, developed a lot of the cooking methods that Chinese people use even today.  Yin’s focus was on the medicinal benefits of food and preached that we should “live to eat” rather than “eat to live.”

By the time the Tang Dynasty (618-907 CE) came around, Chinese food had come a long way.  The cuisines of the Northern and Southern regions of China were already pretty distinct from each other, but now chefs were discovering things like mushrooms and the nutritional benefits of some types of herbs.

However, it is the Ming Dynasty, from 1368 to 1662 CE, that inspired the majority of China’s modern cuisine.  By then, trade routes had opened up and Chinese people had access to peanuts, potatoes, sweet potatoes, and chilies, all of which play a huge part in the Chinese food we all know and love.

The art of Chinese etiquette and dating Asian women

If you want to make a good impression on Asian women you can’t just rely on your native good manners.  The rules of polite behavior in Chinese society can be very different.  What’s more, if you date Asian women with a view to marriage, you will also need to impress their parents, so understanding etiquette is doubly important.

heart book pages

Getting to know people

One of the reasons that, for Asian women, online dating holds so much appeal, is that it is generally considered impolite to introduce yourself to somebody directly.  In person, a mutual acquaintance will usually do this for you.  Online, if you take an interest in one of the beautiful women on our site, you can send a message through us so that, effectively, we can make the introduction.  If you travel to China to meet a woman you have fallen for, one of our staff members will accompany you to introduce you in person.

There is a formal, traditional order for group introductions that takes account of social status, seniority and gender.  This means introductions can sometimes take a while.  It’s important to be patient during this process and wait for your turn.

Managing emotions

There is a stereotype in the West that paints Chinese people as distant and mysterious.  This stems largely from a social code that says it’s polite to avoid displaying emotion in public.  Most importantly, if you want to be respected, you must never lose your temper.  If you find yourself disagreeing with someone, ask that person to help you understand.  Never directly accuse someone of making a mistake or being wrong.

If you find yourself in a difficult situation, smiling can almost always get you out of it.  If you date with Asian women online you may find that sometimes they start arguments to see how far they can push you.  This is generally intended as playful behavior and it’s often accompanied by smiley face icons or smiling photographs that should make it clear what’s really going on.  Flattering a woman at this time can really make her like you.

Giving gifts

The concept of reciprocity is really important in Chinese etiquette.  Although it doesn’t apply when you are courting – you should flatter Asian women by paying for everything when you go out together and sending gifts and flowers when apart.  If you meet your Chinese sweetheart’s parents you will be expected to buy them gifts.  French red wine is particularly popular with men, while women love handcrafted items like scarves or jewelry.  You can also expect to receive gifts from them, and it’s important to respond graciously as if these have precisely equal value to you, no matter what they are.

Polite behavior for couples

No matter how emotional you may feel when you meet with Asian women you have been dating online for the first time, it’s important to show polite restraint.  Chinese couples do not kiss in public.  If things go well, she may be willing to hold your hand.  If she kisses you discreetly after your first date, you will know that things are going very well indeed.