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Dating tips

Chinese dating is more than just courting a Chinese lady

You’ve probably figured out that Chinese dating is a little different than dating a girl from almost anywhere else in the world.  There are cultural barriers that you may never have even thought of.

dating

In an effort to help you combat these cultural barriers with as little confusion and embarrassment as possible, we’ve put together a list of some really helpful hints.  Just remember, this list isn’t exhaustive, but it will help you understand Chinese dating a little more than you did yesterday.

  1. Be responsive, especially with online dating.  Lots of Chinese women may seem shy during the dating process, but they still pay attention to how you court them.  So, if you receive an email or online message, be sure to respond that same day.
  2. In China, things such as your general health, family situation, and age are not private matters.  Do not be offended if a Chinese woman asks you questions about them.
  3. The same goes for financial matters.  In China, financial status and income are not necessarily private issues.
  4. Many Chinese women will be interested in your education and will probably ask you right away.  If she speaks English well, this usually means she is very well educated in her own right.
  5. Remember, if you have communicated only via email, some of those written messages may have been translated into English.  When you do speak on the phone, don’t make her feel embarrassed by her efforts – embrace them, and try your hand at Chinese.
  6. Never use the phrase, ‘I love you,’ unless you mean it.
  7. Lots of Chinese women do not drink, so when it does come time to meet up, it might be worth an invitation to dinner or coffee rather than to a bar.
  8. If you are the guy, you will be expected to pay for most meals and dates.  This is simply tradition.

Chinese dating tips for Western men

At first glance, Chinese dating can seem extremely complicated.  It’s certainly very different from dating in the West, with much more focus placed on getting to know each other in the company of others before any more intimate encounter is suggested.  In practice, however, it doesn’t take long to find you feet, and Chinese women will understand if you make minor mistakes.  After all, it is partly your different cultural background that’s appealing to them.

Even when you’re using an online Chinese dating site, you’re likely to be more successful if you understand the different expectations Chinese ladies have.

The importance of romance

For most Chinese women, dating is a serious matter, not something they rush into or treat lightly.  It is usually seen as a prelude to a serious commitment and often marriage will come up in conversation early on.  To impress a Chinese woman, it’s important to show her that you are serious.  This is partly done by sending love notes, which our team can translate for you, and partly by sending gifts.  We make it easy to send flowers, which are always warmly received.

Sometimes a Chinese woman will complain about a gift or about something you have said and will appear to get angry. This is usually what is called sajiao; it’s a sort of test of love.  The proper response is to spoil her and show her that she is adored.  If she likes you, this will quickly win her over and you will see that she was being playful.

How to present yourself

China is still a country where it is considered very important that a man can provide for a woman.  As a Westerner, you will already be seen as having high social status, which gives you an advantage, but it’s also important to dress smartly and to make your wealth visible.  If you own a mortgaged house and a modest car, these will still be seen as symbols of great wealth by Chinese standards.

Chinese dating in China

Reliable Chinese dating sites like ours are a great way to meet beautiful Chinese ladies, but sooner or later you are likely to want to go to China to meet them.  First dates usually involve meeting in the company of friends.  We can send a member of our team with you so that you’re not alone and you have help with the language.  The date will most often be in a restaurant and you will be expected to pay for your date’s meal.  If the date goes well and she agrees to another, she is signalling a serious interest.

Sex after a date is unusual but it does happen.  In most situations, if a woman you have met on an online Chinese dating site agrees to have sex with you, it’s because she believes you will marry her.

The importance of family

If you want to marry or have a lasting relationship with a woman you meet on a Chinese dating site online, you will have to win the approval of her family.  The most important way to do this is to be polite, but small gifts for her parents at each meeting are a big help, showing your sincerity.

Asian dating tips every guy should know

Let’s face it, there really is no definitive set of rules when it comes to Asian dating – every experience is unique to the individuals involved.  However, there are some general guidelines that men should keep in mind when starting a new relationship.

Asian dating tips

Tip #1: Figure out what you want

So, what are you looking for in a woman?  It’s the first question you should ask yourself before seeking out a romantic relationship.  This is particularly important when it comes to Asian dating, as the customs differ among the various regions.  Are you ready for marriage?  Do you want someone that has similar interests?  Are family values and Chinese traditions important to you?  Figure out what you really want before beginning a relationship.

Tip #2:  Location, location, location

Geography will undoubtedly become an issue when dating someone from another country.  If you’re dating a girl from China, chances are, she’s got relatives and friends there.  Are you ready to travel overseas to meet her family?  When dating someone from a different country, travel inevitably becomes part of the picture.  If you aren’t ready for that, you might want to rethink your choices.

Tip #3:  Family ties

For the Chinese, family is an important aspect of daily life.  In many cases, marriage is considered a family affair, so you won’t just be dating one lucky lady, but you’ll also be courting her family.  It’s a good idea to discuss family relationships, long-term plans, and expectations early on in the relationship so you aren’t surprised later on.  And remember; be sure to treat her family with the utmost respect.

Tip #4:  Chinese culture and tradition

No two cultures are exactly alike, just like no two people are exactly alike.  However, the Chinese culture is an ancient one with many traditions that have been upheld for generations.  Respect, generosity, and honor are common values that must be observed in every relationship, especially romances.  As you get to know the woman you’re dating, get to know more about her traditions, gender roles, and what she expects from the relationship.